God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason. We should be quick to listen and slow to speak. Listening is about being in the conversation fully present, not thinking about what you are going to say next.

TOO many times we want to BLURT out our AGENDA rather than take the time to CONNECT with another’s agenda.

We show love to others by listening to them–not always talking, talking, talking, but by listening, listening, listening. Are you a listener? Are you fully present when others are sharing their heart? Do you know the needs of those around you? Great spouses are great listeners, great leaders are great listeners, great parents are great listeners. How could you ever know how to connect with someone without listening to them?

This is where evangelism and witnessing can get messy. Well-intentioned people can try to convince others to follow Jesus with a one-size-fits-all type of sales pitch instead of taking the time to truly know what the other person’s needs and struggles are. How do you know what a person needs to know about Christ unless you first listen to what their needs are? You can’t! You don’t know where to start unless you hear where they are coming from. No one wants to be sold into Christianity, they want to find the genuine truth.

Do more than hear. Listen. Hearing goes in one ear and out the other. Listening is about being connected. It is about engaging with what is being said. A person will never gain the respect of others if they cannot listen. Listening is more than just hearing, though. Hearing is the physical act of gathering information through the ears. Listening is the mental processing and emotional understanding of the information we take in.

James 1:19 (NIV)
Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak.

So are you a listener or are you busy doing all of the talking?

People are more impressed by your attention than they are your action. Theodore Roosevelt is credited with saying, “No one cares how much you know till they know how much you care.” We show we care by listening and asking questions. We need to learn how to ask questions and listen to other’s needs. Socrates taught that the quality of the questions we ask will determine the quality of the life we live. When we seek to understand, we will be understood. I am amazed at the lack of questions people ask. I can’t imagine sitting down with others and not asking questions about their life. Everyone has something to teach us. Author and Civil Rights Activist Lillian Smith said, “When you stop learning, stop listening, stop looking and asking questions, always new questions, then it is time to die.”

Lean into a conversation with others. Don’t get so caught up in your agenda as much as you are caught up in them. When you come to genuinely care about what others have to say, others will genuinely care about what you have to say.